Lord Christ,
my flame is still there,
but I cannot reach it.
I can see it burning behind the glass,
locked away from my own hands,
guarded by fear, shame, exhaustion, and silence.
I remember warmth.
I remember fire.
I remember when prayer did not feel like shouting through walls.
But today I am numb.
So come near the glass, Lord.
Sit beside what I cannot touch.
Guard the ember I cannot feel.
Do not let my soul mistake numbness for death.
If I cannot reach the flame,
then You reach it for me.
If I cannot break the glass,
then breathe on it from the other side.
If I cannot pray with fire,
let my smoke still rise to You.
Keep what is holy in me alive
until I can feel its warmth again.
Amen.